So it's funny, I guess all of my problems boil down to me being stubborn about passing the airbag test in INPA. At least for me, INPA is almost nonfunctional with the above zip file of software. I had mixed and matched and gotten the toolchain to the point that it'd work well enough to not throw many errors and to query all the right info, but then NCSEXPERT was broken.
In the end, I just went back to the zip you used, ignored INPA totally, and tried coding. Worked fine.
. Hey, now my fob rolls up my windows, I'm a happy camper.