Thanks for the tip. I read a post that mentioned to start and run the engine until the trans got to temp...I didn't know the fluid would pour out if you shut off the engine, tho. My theory was to introduce the new fluid gradually. I wanted to see how bad the fluid looks at 63,000 miles, and thought the filter could wait.
I was not aware of the need to reset the tranny afterward, have not read that anywhere. I guess this is why the dealer wants $505 in labor to change filter and fluid. This is frustrating, I want to go back to my 90s vintage pre-computer cars.