Hey hunter - Wow - that is contrary to my experience. I'm on my second one - I left the first one at a hand wash place about 6 years ago. They last forever and mine seem to get even softer with use. My previous Bimmer was a black 528i and I never noticed brush marks.
I only use the brush with soapy water (zaino wash) which acts as a lubricant. I stick it in the sudsy wash bucket and shake it a bit to load it up with wash then move that to the car surface. Up and down strokes on the side panels, back to front on the horizontal panels.
When done I rinse it *very* well then sit it on its back to air dry. The next day after it is dry I run my hand across the hairs to fluff them a bit. That's pretty much it.
I really like the brush. For washing, I've tried several kinds of mitts, cotton towels, even a sea sponge and find the brush does the best job, extends my reach so I don't have to bend as far, lasts the longest, and is easy to clean. If you got yours from Griots and you don't think it is soft, call 'em up and explain - I bet they'll send you a new one.
get off the phone and drive