one major flaw I can see immediately is your grip. you have to have a proper grip so you can properly transfer the swing power to the club, and eventually to the ball.
both hands should work as one unit; meaning the right had should be over the left thumb area, and interlocking the rest of the fingers. Thats the Interlocking style of grip, the same concept can be attained without interlocking the fingers and thats what they call the Verdon(overlaped) method popularized by Ben Hogan, which Tiger Woods picked up and now also associated with his name.
More videos of these or any other golf instructions are available at youtube.