Thread: Fully loaded
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      08-18-2010, 06:59 AM   #36
Brigadier General
United Kingdom

Drives: Modified Alpine White E92 335i
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Yorkshire

iTrader: (2)

I respond to tenders most days, my record is 112 pages of FRESH, STEAMING BULLSHIT in less than 30 days. We won that bid too.... So I know a thing or two about language and I know I am good with it.

However, the more words one uses and the more often one writes - I find it becomes easier to convince oneself that ones own way of writing IS correct and cannot be faulted. I know there are several things I DO which my colleagues don't agree with and vice versa.

My reasoning for some of this? Well, English benefits (in my view) from being the MOST complete language in the world. There are very few (if any) situations that can't be explained in English, where other languages would struggle.

When I work with German colleagues, we do meetings in 'Denglish' which is German, but with English to supplement where the German language doesn't accomodate certain terms.

Despite all this, I still feel English lacks for some modern business situations. For example, take ITIL, it can become INCREDIBLY frustrating using ITIL terminology in sales collateral because there are words which are used repetitively as nouns and adjectives... For example, one could say....

'In delivering Best Practice ITIL based service management methodologies, company X will implement tried and tested Change, Incident and Problem Management processes'

This sentence isn't ideal for me. It 'messes with my melon man' when I think that I have the word Management in there twice. Once as a name and once as a thing.... Alternatively, one could still say that ITIL sees 'Service Management' as an 'entity' which needs to be in capitals, as it is being used as a noun etc...

ITIL themselves are unconcerned with such petty matters and whilst they clearly demonstrate that Incidents, Changes, Problems etc are all used as named conventions... There are lots of woolly areas which aren't.

In fact, there is probably a dictionary for it nowadays which I COULD read if I could be arsed, but I'm not. My point is merely that I KNOW I am good with English, but I wouldn't profess to be perfect. But then again, neither is English itself.

And moving slightly back on topic - if you call your car 'Fully Loaded' and any of the following were available (but were not included in the spec) then you are a lying little cock and I would immediately ignore your fucking ad. Because you've lied. Cock.

To be fully loaded it must have:
Bluetooth or Phone as available
Highest possible Nav spec as available
A high or highest set of sound/AV options as available
Electric and/or some kind of upgraded seats
Leather/Equivalent as available
Comfort Features - this is the one people forget. Fully loaded is about comfort (you wouldn't WANT a fully loaded Ariel Atom would you?) so you should have a 'smattering' of appropriate comfort features like Cruise, Heated Seats, Comfort Access etc....

To lack any of these could mean your car is 'high spec' but absolutely not fully loaded. I've seen that term used on a few Lexus recently that DIDN'T have the Multimedia Package.

In a Lexus, that essentially means they ticked no boxes whatsoever, and somehow believe their base spec SE with 'heated/cooled' alcantara seats is Fully Loaded.... I even rang a couple just to tell them what fucking jockeys they are.