I've confirmed that i broke off the tabs as shown in the picture below... i guess i just cranked on it too hard thinking it was a bolt and didn't realize it. And this isn't the type of plug that is supposed to be taken off like the old E46 one, this one is permant lock-in... if you must take it out, you HAVE to break the tabs.
If you're going to unscrew the blew part like you're supposed to, i suggest gripping the black part with a set of pliers and twisting the blue screw off with a soda can tab. The coolant draining process is supposed to take FOREVER i suppose...
before i put the new plug in, i'm going to run some plain R.O. water through the system in order to flush out the old coolant and hopefully get the broken tabs out (if they're still in there).