[ncarter124]

Originally Posted by Dackz

I know exactly what you are saying. When you get it, you realize that it doesnt fix problems and other things. I thought for sure there was no way I could be unhappy, but a year later, I remained unhappy and I had to figure things out as to why.

Like I said, Im very grateful for what I was givin, not many people get that, but I shouldnt have gotten it now, 20 years from now yes. And also, I was doing fine, and happier before I even got this inheritance. All I was able to do with it was buy some things and make some investments. They are material items and do not necissarily make me happy.

I suppose each person has their own belief of happiness and what it entails. I realized that money wasnt one of those things for me. I went soul searching and remembered what was important to me, and Im getting back to that. I think money buys fun, but not happiness.

To counter your point about the inheritance and such though...I was happier before I had the money. I bought all these things and have had fun, but Im not as happy as before, at least Im not quite there (a good soul searching mission can do wonders).

Dont get me wrong though, MILLIONS of dollars would be badass, but it would only make you happy for so long. I think you need to get over the woman thing and start boinking again. If you cant fuck em, then fuck em. Use and lose em. Exact out some revenge. Get a hooker if that makes you feel better about it.

Oh yea, I had a terrible job once...I hated it so much but ya know what? I think that caused me to enjoy everything else quite a bit more and not take for granted the time away from what I hated so much. I dont know if that makes sense or not, but it seems to me that when I had a job I really liked, I took the time off for granted MUCH more.

I dont know what else to say that I havent. I hope your situation improves though. You sound like you could use some YOU time. Find a way to take it.

Yeah that makes sense. I agree that everyone has their own ideas of what happiness is, and to be honest if I ever do get money I might feel the same, but damnit I at least what to see what the other side is like ya know? If I were to get some money by some miracle and it doesn't make me happy, then that in itself would be great, because then at least I can stop pursuing it and go after something else, but for right now I have been on a one track adventure trying to get it, and so far have been completely held prisioner by my lust for financial freedom.

And yeah the miserable job does make everything else better, but right now "everything else" involves my Xbox and saving money for a 135i I am praying to God I can get in another year. I have been saving and paying off debt for this f-ing car since late 2007 for Christ's sake. So I think once I get the car goal behind me and can start actually having a social life (haven't done a single thing in well over a year) again it might improve things. I was much happier when I had my 350z and actually did things. Didn't help me get chicks whatsoever (I am horrible looking) but I at least enjoyed myself a little.

As for the (lol) boinking, no thanks. I have only been with one girl in my entire life, and to be honest, sex is just too stressful to enjoy, so no more of that either. I have no lust for that anymore. <-- laughs at self

[M_Six]

If you're really feeling bad for yourself, go visit a long-term care hospital. Suddenly life won't seem so bad. My little sister spent 12 years in one before her body realized her brain had died 12 years earlier and finally caught up. Those visits to see her always made me realize how quickly life can go horribly wrong. Enjoy the fact that you are awake and can go to work or spend time with your g/f or drive a car or do anything besides lie in a hospital bed staring at the ceiling.

Time spent feeling sorry for yourself is time wasted. I tend to drift towards the blues myself every now and then, but I just have to recall what it was like during those visits to the hospital and I start to see things in a better light.

Also, saving for retirement is critical, but don't overdo it. You have to enjoy the ride to retirement as well. Find a balance that you can live with. Wifey and I have a bunch of our income taken out for a retirement plan pre-tax. We never even see it. We've figured out about how much we need to live comfortably and travel and have a few toys along the way, and the rest goes towards retirement. Don't say you'll start saving for it someday. Start now. I'm a little shocked to realize how close to retirement I suddenly find myself. It's still a ways off, but it's visible now. Like "WTF did THAT come from???"

[mileydog]

ncarter124 , Check it out....

You are debating whether money will bring happiness. I believe that money will bring comfortableness. And ultimately the more comfortable you are, the more happy you become. But one can certainly be comfortable without being ubber rich.

So you say you are saving for a 135. Does a 135 bring you more comfort than a Toyota Camry. I dont think so. Thus you probably wont be any happier.

Conversly, imagine if you were saving for a townhouse...does that bring more comfort. I would think so. The home is where you can invite friends, family, girlfriends over to enjoy their company. The home acts as a place where comfortable activities can occur which may lead to more overall happiness.
Now i am not suggesting you buy a house or car. Rather I think you should focus on what makes you comfortable. Relationship with family? Vacations with friends? Hobbies?
You need to reflect on your life and decide what truly make you more comfortable. If it is a new 135i...by all means get it.

I truly understand your cravings for the luxury/sporty/MAN car, but does that really make you happy. Mentally, I can see how it can lead to a sense of pride based simply on the fact that your drive a BMW and could provide some self-confidence from the outward expressesion to others that you are presumably successfull in life due to the car you drive.
From my personal experience I can tell you from my 2 years of ownership of the 335i, I still get a sense of happiness from the car but soon realize that it's because of my wife and family that also get the opportunity to enjoy the car with me that makes me happy. It is not the car or house but rather the people who are enjoying it with me that leads to happiness. For instance what fun is it to take the car out of the garage and drive down Hwy 1 along the coast with just your ownself.

Ask yourself this...is driving down the coast with a wife and dog in a Camry alot more fun than driving in a e92 by yourself? For some, maybe the luxury car alone could be better but for me its all about the social relationship that don't cost a dime. Your Mom and Dad are still your parents whether you are rich or poor. Another words no matter how sucessful, how much money you have, happy or sad you are, you just can't buy new parents, family or friends.

Although i must admit the 335i is really fun and you probably wouldn't regret the purchase as far as the vehicle is concerned..however i truly think you need to re-evaluate your priorities in terms of being more comfortable.

[ncarter124]

Originally Posted by mileydog

ncarter124 , Check it out....

You are debating whether money will bring happiness. I believe that money will bring comfortableness. And ultimately the more comfortable you are, the more happy you become. But one can certainly be comfortable without being ubber rich.

So you say you are saving for a 135. Does a 135 bring you more comfort than a Toyota Camry. I dont think so. Thus you probably wont be any happier..

That is a good way of putting it. However, the wife thing just isn't for me.

Comfortable? No. More proud of my accomplishments? Yes. Otherwise I would just keep my Kia Sportage because it is reliable, but it does nothing but depress me having to drive it.

Originally Posted by mileydog

Conversly, imagine if you were saving for a townhouse...does that bring more comfort. I would think so. The home is where you can invite friends, family, girlfriends over to enjoy their company. The home acts as a place where comfortable activities can occur which may lead to more overall happiness.
Now i am not suggesting you buy a house or car. Rather I think you should focus on what makes you comfortable. Relationship with family? Vacations with friends? Hobbies?
You need to reflect on your life and decide what truly make you more comfortable. If it is a new 135i...by all means get it.

I am a pretty solitary person. Inviting friends over gives me little joy, so for me, WHAT is in the home is what makes it for me, not WHO, because I never have anybody in my house. Just how I am.

Originally Posted by mileydog

I truly understand your cravings for the luxury/sporty/MAN car, but does that really make you happy. Mentally, I can see how it can lead to a sense of pride based simply on the fact that your drive a BMW and could provide some self-confidence from the outward expressesion to others that you are presumably successfull in life due to the car you drive.
From my personal experience I can tell you from my 2 years of ownership of the 335i, I still get a sense of happiness from the car but soon realize that it's because of my wife and family that also get the opportunity to enjoy the car with me that makes me happy. It is not the car or house but rather the people who are enjoying it with me that leads to happiness. For instance what fun is it to take the car out of the garage and drive down Hwy 1 along the coast with just your ownself. Ask yourself this...is driving down the coast with a wife and dog in a Camry is alot more fun than driving in a e92 by yourself? For some maybe the luxury car alone could be better but for me its all about the social relationship that don't cost a dime. Your Mom and Dad is still your parents whether you are rich or poor. Another words no matter how sucessful, how much money you have, happy or sad you are, you just can't buy new parents, family or friends.

Although i must admit the 335i is really fun and you probably wouldn't regret the purchase..but i truly think you need to re-evaluate your priorities.

Yeah my priorities the last 2 or 3 years revolved around friends etc, but it's time for a change. It's just something I need to do for myself. As for the house, I am not going to have any kids or pass it on to, so I don't really see a point in bothering, but I might eventually, after the car that is.

Originally Posted by mileydog

Ask yourself this...is driving down the coast with a wife and dog in a Camry is alot more fun than driving in a e92 by yourself?

BMW by myself, absolutely without a doubt. I hate when women ride with me. They smell up the cabin with all of the lotions and crap that they wear and bitch about every aspect of your driving, regardless of how well you drive and how terribly they drive, plus you can't turn the stereo up with them in the car, and seldom can put the windows down for fear of them throwing a hissy fit for messing up their precious hair.

[BMdblU]

OP, use some of the money you don't have to end yourself already. No one wants to hear this sh*T.

[ncarter124]

Originally Posted by mileydog

ncarter124 , Check it out....

You are debating whether money will bring happiness. I believe that money will bring comfortableness. And ultimately the more comfortable you are, the more happy you become. But one can certainly be comfortable without being ubber rich.

So you say you are saving for a 135. Does a 135 bring you more comfort than a Toyota Camry. I dont think so. Thus you probably wont be any happier.

Conversly, imagine if you were saving for a townhouse...does that bring more comfort. I would think so. The home is where you can invite friends, family, girlfriends over to enjoy their company. The home acts as a place where comfortable activities can occur which may lead to more overall happiness.
Now i am not suggesting you buy a house or car. Rather I think you should focus on what makes you comfortable. Relationship with family? Vacations with friends? Hobbies?
You need to reflect on your life and decide what truly make you more comfortable. If it is a new 135i...by all means get it.

I truly understand your cravings for the luxury/sporty/MAN car, but does that really make you happy. Mentally, I can see how it can lead to a sense of pride based simply on the fact that your drive a BMW and could provide some self-confidence from the outward expressesion to others that you are presumably successfull in life due to the car you drive.
From my personal experience I can tell you from my 2 years of ownership of the 335i, I still get a sense of happiness from the car but soon realize that it's because of my wife and family that also get the opportunity to enjoy the car with me that makes me happy. It is not the car or house but rather the people who are enjoying it with me that leads to happiness. For instance what fun is it to take the car out of the garage and drive down Hwy 1 along the coast with just your ownself.

Ask yourself this...is driving down the coast with a wife and dog in a Camry alot more fun than driving in a e92 by yourself? For some, maybe the luxury car alone could be better but for me its all about the social relationship that don't cost a dime. Your Mom and Dad are still your parents whether you are rich or poor. Another words no matter how sucessful, how much money you have, happy or sad you are, you just can't buy new parents, family or friends.

Although i must admit the 335i is really fun and you probably wouldn't regret the purchase as far as the vehicle is concerned..however i truly think you need to re-evaluate your priorities in terms of being more comfortable.

Yeah that is a very good point. I actually work for a Hospital Corp., and though I don't see things at the facility level, it is a constant reminder. Plus I have lost several family members to cancer, things like that, so that is a very good point that I realize but don't remind myself of nearly enough.

[BayMoWe335]

Originally Posted by BMdblU

OP, use some of the money you don't have to end yourself already. No one wants to hear this sh*T.

Give me a break my man. I'm puzzled as to why my initial post upset you so much.

Oh well. I'm not suicidal or depressed in general. It's really just confined to money.

[Chenry135]

I understand the way you feel, I just personally dont know how to help... I just think its sad that all the older fellows on this site refer to everyone else younger then them as having "daddy's money"... It really frustrates me.

[BMdblU]

Originally Posted by BayMoWe335

Give me a break my man. I'm puzzled as to why my initial post upset you so much.

Oh well. I'm not suicidal or depressed in general. It's really just confined to money.

you drive a bmw and you're upset about money something is missing. be happy with what you have and kiss the ground you walk on

live in a ditch or a third world country for a month it might help put things in perspective

[E92-Lighting]

what do you guys think is a good yearly salary?

[Feyd]

Originally Posted by E92-Lighting

what do you guys think is a good yearly salary?

That's just it.... I don't know and I doubt the OP does either.

[Bmoney2K4]

Originally Posted by E92-Lighting

what do you guys think is a good yearly salary?

It depends on where you live. In L.A., maybe 200,000 before taxes. That is how ridiculous it is. You can't even buy a decent condo for 600,000 in a relatively good neighberhood because out here, there are many bad ones IMHO

[E92-Lighting]

Originally Posted by BMdblU

you drive a bmw and you're upset about money something is missing. be happy with what you have and kiss the ground you walk on

live in a ditch or a third world country for a month it might help put things in perspective

+1. try the country side of Nanjing

[777ER]

While the OP rasises some valid points;

There's one thing I'm sick of....everyone just wants one thing...MONEY!!!

Last month some guy came to my house asking me to sign a petition to stop the building of a oil or a natural gas pipeline that runs close or near the watershed supply that is used for drinking water for most of Westchester county...he wanted me to donate $$$ to the non-profit organization.

After a few mins of listening to his crap how a few pennies out of your own change can help, just few per day.... then shows me his change out of his pocket. I was like, how about you use that change for the donation, Pennies per day you said?

I was trying to be nice, I was about to slam the front door shut on him when he wouldn't STFU.

I do have one rule I stick to, I never donate $$$, only goods or service.

I don't have any mortage payments since the 2 family house I live in has been paid off 20 years ago before I inheritanced it 7 months ago. I rent out the top floor and the finished basement.

[BayMoWe335]

Originally Posted by E92-Lighting

what do you guys think is a good yearly salary?

Honestly, $200k.

[BayMoWe335]

Update: I Know this thread is old, but just wanted to kind of do a "5 years later" update.

I have now been "corporate" for almost 10 years now and have done fairly well moving up the ranks. I've more than doubled my salary and have a few other benefits (Options, more vacation, less strenuous work, and closer to home) but still feel the EXACT same way. I also have moved into an ungodly tax bracket and feel depressed that much of my money is being sent to the government on programs I don't particularly agree with in principle.

Though my total net worth has grown significantly due to higher salary, investing gains, and overall great market performance since 2010, I still feel extremely inadequate financially.

I have no debt, own my house and cars, and my major expenses are buying stocks when the market dips. When stocks decrease in value, I typically buy more while also feeling depressed about paper losses. They will recover, but the psychological toll becomes frustrating, particularly as a person's portfolio grows.

I recently added 2 rental property to my income stream, but always have the wrong attitude. Instead of focusing on the postivie of having extra income, I focus on how much of a pain it is to manage and why I don't have 5 or 6 income properties instead of a couple.

Instead of 2,000 shares of AAPL, I want 4,000, or 10,000. I read about the richest and their holdings and just feel like an ant.

I tried a different approach the last few years and enjoyed a little more "blow" moneym like an extravagant trip or a new home theater, but I end up feeling guilty about spending the money in the first place.

[1MOREMOD]

Get a women she will show you what being depressed is all about! Kidding sort of. I kind of know what you mean. I don't have a bunch of money but have done okay and work less now and try to enjoy my time off. Figure out what can be done with that money that will make you happier. Hobby, charity, saving dolphins whatever.

[Whostheboss]

You're 29 or 30yrs by now?
You're really obsessed about money. That's good. The only bad i see is that you're allowing it to make you depressed.
I like money as well but i don't really let it depress me when i know i could have more.
What helps me stay happy is the gift God gave me in talents, i love drawing, designing apps and games and dating all varieties of women.

Don't be so obsessed with the benjis, have fun today not tomorrow. After you make all these millions that you speak of, God forbid but what if you get hit by a bus or catch some deadly sickness.... and then what? All the money you made is wasted.

[BMW F22]

I have been there, done that. I have also learned that it's pointless comparing yourself to others. There will always be someone who's richer or poorer. The point is to be happy with what you have and where you are. Worrying will always drag you down. Does everyone want to be a billionaire? Probably. But so what? If you're always worrying about money it doesn't matter how much you have as it is never enough. I'm not saying that it's a bad idea to pursue money. I am saying that you have to stop worrying and start living (a good book to read as well).

[Whostheboss]

Originally Posted by BMW F22

I have been there, done that. I have also learned that it's pointless comparing yourself to others. There will always be someone who's richer or poorer. The point is to be happy with what you have and where you are. Worrying will always drag you down. Does everyone want to be a billionaire? Probably. But so what? If you're always worrying about money it doesn't matter how much you have as it is never enough. I'm not saying that it's a bad idea to pursue money. I am saying that you have to stop worrying and start living (a good book to read as well).

+Infinity

[shoei]

In the words of the immortal poet Jay-Z;

"Mo' money mo' problems..."

[BayMoWe335]

Originally Posted by Whostheboss

You're 29 or 30yrs by now?
You're really obsessed about money. That's good. The only bad i see is that you're allowing it to make you depressed.
I like money as well but i don't really let it depress me when i know i could have more.
What helps me stay happy is the gift God gave me in talents, i love drawing, designing apps and games and dating all varieties of women.

Don't be so obsessed with the benjis, have fun today not tomorrow. After you make all these millions that you speak of, God forbid but what if you get hit by a bus or catch some deadly sickness.... and then what? All the money you made is wasted.

Yeah, I do get caught up in money, but I also have a lot of hobbies and I'm married now. We love to travel, very into working out and health, and enjoy cooking. We always talk about being glad we don't have to worry or fight about money, but it can be a source of stress for me...but not in the usual sense.

I struggle with perhaps have a couple million, but wanting $10m. I'm sure if I had $10m, I'd want $50m.