[335Newbie]

It seems that some of our dealers think we are collectively very gullible.

Please share stupid reasons, observations, and comments from the dealerships in order for us to compile the definitive list of dealer BS.

An interesting collection of dumb statements given to us by SA's, CA's, and managers might make for not only interesting reading, but could be useful when we hear a repeated dumb statement.

For example - "You're driving it to slow". Or - "It was meant to rattle".
(These just appeared on a different thread. Apologies to the authors, but I thought they were classics.)

Then, at the dealership, we just scroll down our preprinted list of BS, and tell the numbskull that he just repeated BS answer #37 and he needs a new one. It's been used before and was BS then too.

The dealers could, I'm sure, create an equally entertaining list of stupid things they've heard said by fellow employees and customers alike.

[e90driver]

"The transmission is supposed to shift like that in sport mode, there is nothing wrong with it"

2 days later, my transmission fails and car has to be towed.

[halfpast3]

Originally Posted by 335Newbie

The dealers could, I'm sure, create an equally entertaining list of stupid things they've heard said by fellow employees and customers alike.

People know I hate the dealer bashing, but this quote makes you worthy

When my wifes moonroof exploded on the freeway the SM told me "moonroofs don't just spontaneously combust". Pretty good one on his part I'd say, I laughed....except IT DID!

[Ronnb]

Yeah heres one. Me and my friend was looking at used trucks, one had a service light on. We point that out to the salemen, he said word for word. "Oh thats not a problem. l would be afraid to buy a car that didnt have the light on." Wow, how stupid did he think we were. The other best statement was when i went to the GM dealer to look and buy a 1995 Z-28 i showed up in my winter beater, the salemen said" when youj can afford one, let me know!" Wow again. Ron

[BMWdmk]

a long long LONG time ago

i haven't heard of any fuel pump failures
-Assael BMW

took it in then he tell me the unit is on back order......

[0utlier]

Not a BMW dealer story per se, or something that was said, but interesting nonetheless. I test drove a car for my wife. For the next couple of weeks the salesman called me every single day. I finally took my wife up to the dealer for a test drive. She liked the car. Told the sales manager to locate the car we wanted and we'd do the deal.

Sales manager or salesman never called me back. We bought an Acura MDX instead.

[seven_227]

"The exhaust will void your warranty, you shouldn't install an exhaust it only adds noise and no power, if you want power change your pistons".


I was like WTF!!! on the inside, but replied with "Really? Thanks for the advice".

[attorneyscott]

This is a Benz story -- my dad went into a Benz dealership to look at the new ML, and he got into an argument with a salesperson who insisted VEHEMENTLY that the ML is built in Germany. You'd think working at a Benz store someone would have told them about M-B's plant in Alabama...

[335xi2k8]

True Story, a week ago a lexus sales person swore to me that the IS-F does the quarter in a little over 10 seconds stock..hahahha

[Craigito]

"I don't know how to tell you this sir, but we have no idea where your car is"

[xquisit]

"Sorry the alpine white 3 series do not come with black interior."

I should've taken out the pimp hand, huh?

[asian010]

"sir im sorry but, im gay."

[mike1ny]

that loud screeching noise your hearing is just your turbo spooling up

[Mattscott]

I've had both of these told to me.

"We've never heard of fuel pump failures on the 335"

"No on has ever complained about not having an oil cooler before"

[jm1234]

I had a salesman tell me the M3 was supercharged. I let him know it was NA. To his credit he checked and guess what... He fessed up and admitted that he thought it was supercharged because of the power bulge (which does looks like a blower scoop, sort of, if you aren't real familiar with the mechanics and what they are for).

I also got this one which I thought was pretty good (although it did convince me to take my business to another dealer):

The black car is Jet Black,Black Novillo Leather, Premium Package, Moon roof, Heated front seats
Price is $xxxxx. The only way to drive one I found out is to buy one. With a Deposit on an order or incoming car they will let the Salesperson Take you for a Short Drive. There will definately be a "Wow Factor" with this car compared to an E36 M3. I will make sure the Demo drive will be exciting for you, your just gonna have to hang on to the "OH Shit" Grab handles.

I've been on a road course with a professional driver in a GT car. Not the most awesome car and not the worlds best driver but I'm sure it was more fun than a salesman on surface streets in an M3! I didn't need the "grab handles" on that ride either, but...I once rode a taxi in Rome where I needed the "OH Shit" handle. That wasn't much fun...

[Gesler]

not a dealer, but, "I wouldn't recommend it but if you really want it, I can swap the CDV to the modified one for $250" when I took my modified CDV to an independent "foreign automobile" service.

[Mattscott]

Originally Posted by dmkaldas

a long long LONG time ago

i haven't heard of any fuel pump failures
-Assael BMW

took it in then he tell me the unit is on back order......

I barely read this one. It's weird how none of the dealers have heard of this.

[Kamando]

Scenario1: I am taking my E90 330i in to trade it in and pick up the E92 335i I ordered. Dealership had been storing my winter tires for me all summer. It is mid november when I am picking up the 335 so I tell the dealership to put my 17" winter tires on and store the summer tires before I take delivery.

The person(s) putting on my winter tires didn't want to do it and claimed since they are aftermarket tires and rims and not BMW tires/rims they cannot guarantee it will fit with the brakes and thus would be liable if I were to get into an accident because of it. This from the same dealership that had put the same winter tire setup on the E90 (which has the same size brakes as the E92) the winter previous without any issues.

Scenario2: I go to the parts department and order the rear fog light switch. I tell the parts guy I need part number 61 31 6 932 796. He looks at me all upset and says how did you get this part number?!

Scenario3: How about the debacle with the Style 230 19" rims with the US dealers saying we get them from the factory for '08 and Munich putting the Kaybash on that. (which I may inadvertantly be partly responsible for) Munich intially kicked my E92 order back because I had the Style 230's from the factory option selected and they said this is not possible. I had my sales agent show Munich that the US dealers are saying US spec cars get the option to have 230's from the factory. Shortly after that Munich blew a gasket and crushed all 230 orders.

[328skidpad]

When i had my nissan 350z it constantly would pull to the right after two alignments, two of the sales persons said that it was the road I was driving on. Then the sales manager added that sometimes the right side of the road is lower than the left causing it to veer right. I sold that car because Nissan service is pathetic and they are clueless about their TSB.

A more recent one last week, I asked my dealership how much it costs to install a front aero lip on my incoming 335 coupe. He went upstairs to the service dept and told me that it takes 4 hours to install the lip. He said they have to take off the front bumper, glue the lip and clamp it. So I have to pay $150 for a 30 minute clamp and be charged 3.5 hours for the glue to dry.

[Double White]

A few years back i was looking for a car and i was interested in the dodge neon srt-4 when i asked the sales person how fast these cars were he told me " a little under 11 seconds on a quarter mile" I pretended to get a call and left the dealer

[pony_trekker]

Originally Posted by Ronnb

Yeah heres one. Me and my friend was looking at used trucks, one had a service light on. We point that out to the salemen, he said word for word. "Oh thats not a problem. l would be afraid to buy a car that didnt have the light on." Wow, how stupid did he think we were. The other best statement was when i went to the GM dealer to look and buy a 1995 Z-28 i showed up in my winter beater, the salemen said" when youj can afford one, let me know!" Wow again. Ron

Subarus are famous for warped rotors. Drove a used one hit the brakes and felt rudda rudda rudda -- "Oh no that's the ABS."

[E90330iS]

Quoted from today at Assael: "The 2 door M3 does not have the moonroof as an option, if you want the moonroof you should look into the 4 door." Wow.. obviously trying to sell one of the M3s on the floor.