Share your dumb statements from dealers

ruxp · 03-23-2008, 04:30 PM

I heard so many dumb things from the SA I was dealing with it was amazing. One that I recall was that I was told that "changing to non run-flat tires will void your warranty." ...

McLuVan · 03-23-2008, 06:01 PM

"You Drive Too Slow.....thats y your brakes are wearing fast"

Remonster · 03-23-2008, 06:40 PM

My sales advisor wouldn't tell me how to fully disable DSC/DTC, as soon as I got off the lot I held down the button for a few seconds assuming that would work and it did

I then proceded to stab the throttle in a turn and spin out.

Not because I was showing off to my friend who was there when I got the car, but because my car before that was an E36 318is (with a cracked exhaust and slipping cluch to boot) and I used to floor it just to get to the speed limit, the difference in power between my 2 cars is appalling haha.

shift330 · 03-23-2008, 07:32 PM

Wow! Some funny lies. I love my SA. "If it breaks within 100k, we'll fix it....*looking at my mods* I just don't want to know how it happened."

McLuVan · 03-23-2008, 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shift330

Wow! Some funny lies. I love my SA. "If it breaks within 100k, we'll fix it....*looking at my mods* I just don't want to know how it happened."

denlin68 · 03-23-2008, 08:50 PM

Me: "So I heard there are many tunes out there for the 335i"
Sales Person "If we find out that would void your warranty"

Freaking dirtbag

L~R~G nor cal · 03-23-2008, 09:00 PM

Ya, like I said my SA is a cool dude. I have all dinan mods so I am not worried one bit, but I asked about the warr and mods. He said "I dont care if you blow the motor and tranny; as long as the car is stock we have to cover it. Even if i can see where you tapped in for your program or any other mods; WHERE IS MY PROOF? It cant be found, so go all out and if anything happens put it back to stock.

L~R~G nor cal · 03-23-2008, 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by N54Fun

Talking with sales guy yesterday about e90 (sticker of $70k without markup!) and e92 M3's on the floor...

"Buy it today and you'll be the first one in California to own one."

Ha!

Well it is true! You would be the first person to spend that much on a e90 that is non-"m". LOL

335Newbie · 03-24-2008, 07:29 AM

Bump

airwolf878 · 03-24-2008, 09:37 AM

I visited a dealer last week and asked the sales person when the 335 diesel would be available for delivery. His response... "They'll be available in November, just in time for the fuel to gel up."

E90SLAM · 03-24-2008, 10:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by japac1

1. Me: That's a nice looking E46 over there.
SA: I have no idea what you're talking about

2. Me: (at delivery) can you go over voice command?
SA: you don't have voice command (apparently older e90's had a VC button below i-drive knob, but not after 3/07)

3. Me: I need the "y" cable for 6FL (delivered without it)
SA's manager: you don't have 6FL..wait, what's 6FL??

Idiots....

Same thing happened when I was at Assael BMW....
I was talking to the CA when I was showing my coworker to test drive the 3'er (he was in the market shopping for a 3'er, new C-class, or IS250).....he asked me...."What's E90???"

Then the CA kept talking to me instead of the "potential buyer"....WTF???

And he said the E93 is so rare that people are willing to buy 5K-8K over STICKER price to get one!!!

And you can get one as an INVESTMENT!!! (MORE

)

335Newbie · 03-24-2008, 11:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by E90SLAM

Same thing happened when I was at Assael BMW....
I was talking to the CA when I was showing my coworker to test drive the 3'er (he was in the market shopping for a 3'er, new C-class, or IS250).....he asked me...."What's E90???"

Then the CA kept talking to me instead of the "potential buyer"....WTF???

And he said the E93 is so rare that people are willing to buy 5K-8K over STICKER price to get one!!!

And you can get one as an INVESTMENT!!! (MORE

)

Damn. When I bought my E92, I did so expecting it to be a depreciating asset. If I had only waited until the E93 came out, I could have gotten an appreciating asset.

AWD Addict · 03-24-2008, 11:20 AM

"We simply can't swap out the maple trim for the poplar. We'd have to take the entire dash apart, and it could take days, plus, we'd have to charge you for the labor. Most everyone has to make some concessions when they buy a BMW."

I said "fine," I guess I'll just not buy this car today, and I'll order one exactly how I want it.

Wasn't the answer he was hoping for.

ede92 · 03-24-2008, 11:25 AM

FMW BMW Natick Mass: "There are only 8 335xi's in stock on the East Coast right now

"

To which I responded:
"That's interesting, that is how many your competition in Shrewsbury has on the lot right now

"

SunnyBoo · 03-24-2008, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ejazbmw

"the 335 isn't that great you should look into a 528".....open road bmw.

..........................

f30er · 03-24-2008, 01:45 PM

This morning:
My uncle's Lexus has been having battery problems so he asked me to take it in for him this morning.

Me: This is my uncle Mr. so-and-so's car.
SA: O yea, he's a great customer! Very nice and simple man.
Me: Riiight. Anyways, the battery in his Lexus won't hold a charge, he told me he had the same problem last year and brought it in to you.
SA: O thats not a problem! It's probably time for his yearly battery change.
Me: Huh?
SA: Yea, all cars need their battery changed every 15-18 months, especially the higher end models.
Me: Uh huh. Ok. Hey, was that a Sears I saw just down the road?
SA: Yes
Me: Thank you.

Went to Sears, stuck in a new Diehard, called my uncle and told him I put in a Lexus super battery that won't die and doesn't need to be changed every year.

My 335i:
"Fuel pump problems, no never heard of 'em." Preston BMW Niles, OH
"Oil cooler retrofit for 335i's w/Sport Package? Never heard of it." Preston BMW, OH & Valencia BMW, CA
"The brakes only squeak because they're warming up." Valencia BMW, CA

Me and a friend went to check out the new 'vette's a few years back and saw the Chevy SSR in the showroom.
SA: This is a great truck, really fast, has the retro feel, and look, you can easily fit 4 full golf bags in the back!
My friend: Why would you need 4 golf bags in a 2-seater?
SA: Ummmmm, cuz ummmmmm, uhhhhhhhhhh............
We left before he thought of an answer....

RyanDe680 · 03-24-2008, 01:52 PM

My favorite from Elmhurst BMW:

"We own the building, so we don't care how long the car sits on the floor or the lot"

jumpingjz · 03-24-2008, 02:08 PM

True story, Assael BMW

SM: 328 Coupe sports package is part of premium package, we dont separate the two, sports is premium...
Me: But this Configuration page print out from Edmund shows that they are separate packages
SM: Edmund's wrong
Me: But this configuration page print out from BMWNA shows that they are
SM: BMWNA's showing international config
Me: But this configuration page print out from BMWUSA shows that they are
SM:...BMWUSA's wrong...

Yeah i walked out right after that...

JZ

Haris · 03-24-2008, 02:38 PM

few years ago... toyota dealership

ME: How much for installing this quick shifter in Celica?
SA: 5 hours of labor

ME: Went home, printed a DIY tutorial and installed it in 45 mins.

continentalg5 · 03-24-2008, 02:48 PM

At a Jaguar dealership after coming back from a test drive with the intent to lease the XF very soon:

-Did you like it?
-Yep.
-Do you want to lease it now?
-Not necessarily, I need to digest the test drive and sort out how it felt in my mind first.
-Oh, well than I think it's best if you leave now, this dealership is for those who want their cars now, not later.
-Oh really, okay, well I'm about to put an order in for an S5 or 335 in about...ohh...twenty minutes or so. I'll let you tend to those other people who are clobbering to lease your cars today. (There was NO ONE besides salesmen in or around the dealership.)

noro · 03-24-2008, 02:49 PM

During a sales process

SA: Now... do you want to upgrade the wheels to a larger size.
ME: No not really, plus don't see the need to add more weight
SA: Heavier wheels are better for cornering.

The good news is that I was able to convince him in the opposite.

xquisit · 03-24-2008, 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by continentalg5

At a Jaguar dealership after coming back from a test drive with the intent to lease the XF very soon:

-Did you like it?
-Yep.
-Do you want to lease it now?
-Not necessarily, I need to digest the test drive and sort out how it felt in my mind first.
-Oh, well than I think it's best if you leave now, this dealership is for those who want their cars now, not later.
-Oh really, okay, well I'm about to put an order in for an S5 or 335 in about...ohh...twenty minutes or so. I'll let you tend to those other people who are clobbering to lease their cars today. (There was NO ONE besides salesmen in or around the dealership.

03-23-2008, 04:30 PM	#45
ruxp Captain 45 Rep 698 Posts Drives: 2008 BMW 335xi Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Minneapolis iTrader: (1)	I heard so many dumb things from the SA I was dealing with it was amazing. One that I recall was that I was told that "changing to non run-flat tires will void your warranty." ...
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03-23-2008, 06:01 PM	#46
McLuVan Lieutenant General 304 Rep 13,114 Posts Drives: ///M3 Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Socal~818~ iTrader: (1)	"You Drive Too Slow.....thats y your brakes are wearing fast" __________________
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03-23-2008, 06:40 PM	#47
Remonster Lieutenant Colonel 824 Rep 1,584 Posts Drives: E90 M3 Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: San Diego iTrader: (0)	My sales advisor wouldn't tell me how to fully disable DSC/DTC, as soon as I got off the lot I held down the button for a few seconds assuming that would work and it did I then proceded to stab the throttle in a turn and spin out. Not because I was showing off to my friend who was there when I got the car, but because my car before that was an E36 318is (with a cracked exhaust and slipping cluch to boot) and I used to floor it just to get to the speed limit, the difference in power between my 2 cars is appalling haha.
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03-23-2008, 07:32 PM	#48
shift330 Blue Force Tracker 124 Rep 1,372 Posts Drives: 2010 Hyundai Genesis Coupe Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Sierra Vista, AZ iTrader: (6) Garage List 2006 330i [0.00]	Wow! Some funny lies. I love my SA. "If it breaks within 100k, we'll fix it....looking at my mods I just don't want to know how it happened." __________________ Stay safe 855th MP Company! Hosmer/Espinoza you're my boys!!
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03-23-2008, 08:50 PM	#50
denlin68 台妹爱我 14 Rep 323 Posts Drives: 2012 Evolution X Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Earth, Solar System iTrader: (1)	Me: "So I heard there are many tunes out there for the 335i" Sales Person "If we find out that would void your warranty" Freaking dirtbag __________________ 台客 2003 BMW 330i SOLD 2008 BMW 335i SOLD 2012 Mitsubishi Evolution X Current 2013 BMWX1 xDrive28i Current
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03-23-2008, 09:00 PM	#51
L~R~G nor cal Perfection Is In The Details 67 Rep 1,044 Posts Drives: 06 E90 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Sacramento, CA iTrader: (1) Garage List 2006 325i [0.00]	Ya, like I said my SA is a cool dude. I have all dinan mods so I am not worried one bit, but I asked about the warr and mods. He said "I dont care if you blow the motor and tranny; as long as the car is stock we have to cover it. Even if i can see where you tapped in for your program or any other mods; WHERE IS MY PROOF? It cant be found, so go all out and if anything happens put it back to stock. __________________ 2006 E90 SG-Dinan Ram Air Intake-Dinan Throttle Body-Dinan Exhaust-19' Hyperblack CSL's-15/5 tint-Matte Black Grills-M3 Spoiler Lip-Amber Delete-Smoke Side Signals
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03-24-2008, 07:29 AM	#53
335Newbie Second Lieutenant 26 Rep 218 Posts Drives: 2007 335i Montego Blue E92 Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Rochester NY iTrader: (0)	Bump __________________ ZPP, ZSP, NAVI, STEP, PADDLES, CA, PDC, HEATED SEATS, debadged, painted reflectors, plate frames, & keyhole cover, GP Thunders 8500 angels & fogs, Euphoria 6K High Powered Interior LED's, pearlescent E-brake handle, and mud guards, Split Second Turbo Tuner.
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03-24-2008, 09:37 AM	#54
airwolf878 First Lieutenant 14 Rep 329 Posts Drives: 2014 435i Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Minneapolis iTrader: (1)	I visited a dealer last week and asked the sales person when the 335 diesel would be available for delivery. His response... "They'll be available in November, just in time for the fuel to gel up."
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03-24-2008, 11:20 AM	#57
AWD Addict Chief Executive 300 Rep 2,886 Posts Drives: 2008 335xi 6spd Coupe Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Boston iTrader: (1) Garage List 2008 335xi [0.00]	"We simply can't swap out the maple trim for the poplar. We'd have to take the entire dash apart, and it could take days, plus, we'd have to charge you for the labor. Most everyone has to make some concessions when they buy a BMW." I said "fine," I guess I'll just not buy this car today, and I'll order one exactly how I want it. Wasn't the answer he was hoping for.
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03-24-2008, 11:25 AM	#58
ede92 Lieutenant 16 Rep 510 Posts Drives: 2014 Porsche 911 Cab 7MT Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Boston Area iTrader: (0)	FMW BMW Natick Mass: "There are only 8 335xi's in stock on the East Coast right now " To which I responded: "That's interesting, that is how many your competition in Shrewsbury has on the lot right now " __________________ 2014 911 C2 Cab, Considering adding 2er convertible Past - 2011 328i Convertible 2008 BMW 335xi Coupe (ED), 2003 BMW 530i, 1999 BMW 528i
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03-24-2008, 01:45 PM	#60
f30er Captain 126 Rep 993 Posts Drives: F85 Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: OTP iTrader: (6) Garage List 2014 Jaguar F-Type R [0.00] 2016 GMC Yukon XL [0.00] 2018 BMW X5M [0.00]	This morning: My uncle's Lexus has been having battery problems so he asked me to take it in for him this morning. Me: This is my uncle Mr. so-and-so's car. SA: O yea, he's a great customer! Very nice and simple man. Me: Riiight. Anyways, the battery in his Lexus won't hold a charge, he told me he had the same problem last year and brought it in to you. SA: O thats not a problem! It's probably time for his yearly battery change. Me: Huh? SA: Yea, all cars need their battery changed every 15-18 months, especially the higher end models. Me: Uh huh. Ok. Hey, was that a Sears I saw just down the road? SA: Yes Me: Thank you. Went to Sears, stuck in a new Diehard, called my uncle and told him I put in a Lexus super battery that won't die and doesn't need to be changed every year. My 335i: "Fuel pump problems, no never heard of 'em." Preston BMW Niles, OH "Oil cooler retrofit for 335i's w/Sport Package? Never heard of it." Preston BMW, OH & Valencia BMW, CA "The brakes only squeak because they're warming up." Valencia BMW, CA Me and a friend went to check out the new 'vette's a few years back and saw the Chevy SSR in the showroom. SA: This is a great truck, really fast, has the retro feel, and look, you can easily fit 4 full golf bags in the back! My friend: Why would you need 4 golf bags in a 2-seater? SA: Ummmmm, cuz ummmmmm, uhhhhhhhhhh............ We left before he thought of an answer....
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03-24-2008, 01:52 PM	#61
RyanDe680 Investor Relations 60 Rep 221 Posts Drives: 2018 M3 ZCP Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Western Springs, IL iTrader: (0)	My favorite from Elmhurst BMW: "We own the building, so we don't care how long the car sits on the floor or the lot" __________________ '18 M3 ZCP \| '13 RX 450h \| '11 Range Rover Sport \| '08 335i \| '06 IS250 \| '02 330 Dinan 3
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03-24-2008, 02:08 PM	#62
jumpingjz Major General 71 Rep 5,425 Posts Drives: 2007 328i Coupe Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Monterey Park, CA iTrader: (4)	True story, Assael BMW SM: 328 Coupe sports package is part of premium package, we dont separate the two, sports is premium... Me: But this Configuration page print out from Edmund shows that they are separate packages SM: Edmund's wrong Me: But this configuration page print out from BMWNA shows that they are SM: BMWNA's showing international config Me: But this configuration page print out from BMWUSA shows that they are SM:...BMWUSA's wrong... Yeah i walked out right after that... JZ
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03-24-2008, 02:38 PM	#63
Haris Lieutenant 169 Rep 481 Posts Drives: F82 BMW M4 Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: NJ iTrader: (0) Garage List 2012 BMW X5 xDrive50i [0.00]	few years ago... toyota dealership ME: How much for installing this quick shifter in Celica? SA: 5 hours of labor ME: Went home, printed a DIY tutorial and installed it in 45 mins. __________________ 2021 BMW X7 M50i + 2015 BMW M4 Retired: 2018 Audi Q7 \| 2015 BMW X5 xDrive35i \| 2012 BMW X5 xDrive50i \| 2010 Audi S4 \| 2007 335i Coupe Creator of Leasematic - Lease/Loan Calculator \| iOS App Store \| Android Google Play
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03-24-2008, 02:48 PM	#64
continentalg5 Major 17 Rep 1,074 Posts Drives: BMW Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Earth iTrader: (0)	At a Jaguar dealership after coming back from a test drive with the intent to lease the XF very soon: -Did you like it? -Yep. -Do you want to lease it now? -Not necessarily, I need to digest the test drive and sort out how it felt in my mind first. -Oh, well than I think it's best if you leave now, this dealership is for those who want their cars now, not later. -Oh really, okay, well I'm about to put an order in for an S5 or 335 in about...ohh...twenty minutes or so. I'll let you tend to those other people who are clobbering to lease your cars today. (There was NO ONE besides salesmen in or around the dealership.) Last edited by continentalg5; 03-24-2008 at 03:42 PM..
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03-24-2008, 02:49 PM	#65
noro Colonel 90 Rep 2,707 Posts Drives: '91 M3, '04 E46 ZHP, '72 2002 Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Boston iTrader: (0)	During a sales process SA: Now... do you want to upgrade the wheels to a larger size. ME: No not really, plus don't see the need to add more weight SA: Heavier wheels are better for cornering. The good news is that I was able to convince him in the opposite. __________________ zhpregistry.net - ZHP stats and free classifieds.
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