[ed335d]

A guy goes to the Tax Office to apply for a job.

The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'
He replies, 'Yes - caffeine.'

'Have you ever been in the military service?'
Yes,' he says. 'I was in Iraq for two years.'
The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward
employment.'

Then he asks, 'Are you disabled in any way?'
The guy says, 'Yes...an IED exploded near me and I lost both of my
testicles.'

The interviewer grimaces and then says, 'O.K. You've got enough points
for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 8:00A.M. to 4:00
P.M. You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10:00A.M.
every day..'


The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the work hours are from 8:00 A.M. to 4:00 P.M., why don't you want me to here until 10:00A.M.?'

This is a government job,' the interviewer says.
'For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and
scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that.

[E902717]

[kgb1637]

Ha nice

[Carrera RSR]

Scouse vasectomy


After having their 11th child, a Liverpool couple decided that was
enough, as the social wouldn't buy them a bigger bed and they weren't
strong enough to nick one.


The husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't
want to have any more children.


The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would
fix the problem but it was expensive. A less costly alternative was to
go home, get a firework, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the
can up to his ear and count to 10.


The Scouser said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest guy in the
world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my
ear is going to help me.'


'Trust me, it will do the job', said the doctor.


So the man went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can. He held the
can up to his ear and began to count: '1, 2, 3, 4, 5,' at which point he
paused, placed the beer can between his legs so he could continue
counting on his other hand.


This procedure also works in Bury, parts of Warrington and
anywhere in Essex

[ed335d]

Originally Posted by carrerarsr

Scouse vasectomy


After having their 11th child, a Liverpool couple decided that was
enough, as the social wouldn't buy them a bigger bed and they weren't
strong enough to nick one.


The husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't
want to have any more children.


The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would
fix the problem but it was expensive. A less costly alternative was to
go home, get a firework, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the
can up to his ear and count to 10.


The Scouser said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest guy in the
world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my
ear is going to help me.'


'Trust me, it will do the job', said the doctor.


So the man went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can. He held the
can up to his ear and began to count: '1, 2, 3, 4, 5,' at which point he
paused, placed the beer can between his legs so he could continue
counting on his other hand.


This procedure also works in Bury, parts of Warrington and
anywhere in Essex