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      08-04-2008, 09:33 AM   #1
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Talking I can't stop laughing...



Just saw this on the US side of the forum...


Quote:
Originally Posted by TT3 iN NyC View Post
Hello all,

I just came across a tread talking about a recall on the Bridgestone EL-42 tires. I went to go check the car and I seen that I have 2 Potenza and 2 bridgestone tires.

Is this normal?


And the best reply so far...


Quote:
Originally Posted by Orient330iNYC View Post
drive forward about 1.5 feet. then read again.
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      08-04-2008, 09:45 AM   #2
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      08-04-2008, 10:14 AM   #3
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Quality......Bless.

Some of our cousins from accross the pond may consider commencing legal proceedings for this clear failure to demostrate a duty of care to the American consumer by labelling tyres inadequately. How very dare they!

Watch this space.......'Bridgestone forced to label tyre walls more clearly for USA consumers'

Here's 9 very priceless "American Moments"

Number 6 is a classic!

ONE Recently, when I went to McDonald's, I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. 'We don't have a half dozen nuggets,' said the little teenage twit at the counter. 'You don't?' I replied. 'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply. 'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?' 'That's right.' So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.

TWO I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the 'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?' I said to her , 'I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today.' She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy'.

FOUR I recently saw a distraught young woman weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they, (pointing to a distant convenience store), would have a battery to fit this?' 'Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked. 'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk.'

FIVE Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use copier machine paper,' the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.

SIX I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in the movie 'Twister'. I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the 'cruise control' and then went in the back to make a sandwich.

SEVEN My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: 'I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?'

EIGHT Police in Radnor , Pa. interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message 'He's lying' was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the 'lie detector' was working, the suspect confessed.

NINE A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her child to the emergency room as he was eating ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and everything should be fine. The mother then says, 'I just gave him some ant killer.....'
The dispatcher replies, 'Rush him in to emergency room!'
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      08-04-2008, 10:23 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilR View Post
Quality......Bless.

Some of our cousins from accross the pond may consider commencing legal proceedings for this clear failure to demostrate a duty of care to the American consumer by labelling tyres inadequately. How very dare they!

Watch this space.......'Bridgestone forced to label tyre walls more clearly for USA consumers'

Here's 9 very priceless "American Moments"


ps.. I'm sure it just said "10 very priceless......." - quick fingered edit perhaps?!!!!
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      08-04-2008, 10:30 AM   #5
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Surely your seeing things

Have you been drinking the contents of your Avitar E92Fan?
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      08-04-2008, 10:36 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilR View Post
Surely your seeing things

Have you been drinking the contents of your Avitar E92Fan?
Everyday, religiously...!! That's why I see so well!!

Last edited by E92Fan; 08-04-2008 at 11:45 AM.
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      08-04-2008, 11:41 AM   #7
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Maybe it's time to rethink the emmigration...
Either that, or go anyway and become USA's most intelligent man...
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      08-04-2008, 04:30 PM   #8
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I once bought an item in California and the cashier asked, "Cash, check, or charge?" I inquired, "Do you take Federal Reserve Notes?" Before I could stop her she'd said, "I don't know, let me ask.", locked up the register, and went to her supervisor. She was not amused when she returned after being told that every bill in the (modern) U.S. currency says "FEDERAL RESERVE NOTE" across the top; in other words, cash.

I did the same thing the following week to another cashier who flat out said, "No." I said I'd pay cash, then.
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      08-04-2008, 04:32 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sheps View Post
Maybe it's time to rethink the emmigration...
Either that, or go anyway and become USA's most intelligent man...
And raise the average IQ of both countries in the process?
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      08-04-2008, 04:54 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SoYank View Post
And raise the average IQ of both countries in the process?
Oooh Floyd -

Great thread BTW!
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      08-05-2008, 02:50 AM   #11
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Check this one out!

Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket Scientist!! (true story)

Scientists at Roll Royce built a gun specifically to launch dead
chickens at the windshields of airliners and military
jets, all travelling at maximum velocity.

The idea was to simulate the frequent incidents
of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of
the windshields.

American engineers heard about the gun and were eager to
test it on the windshields of their new high-speed trains.

Arrangements were made and a gun was sent to the American
engineers. When the gun was fired, the engineers watched
in shock as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the
shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's back-rest in two and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin.

The horrified engineers sent Rolls Royce the film of the disastrous results
of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield
and begged the British scientists for suggestions.

Rolls Royce responded with a one-line memo

'Defrost the chicken.'
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      08-05-2008, 03:21 AM   #12
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      08-05-2008, 03:51 AM   #13
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Wow this thread is worthless
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      08-05-2008, 04:06 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eazydoezit View Post
Wow this thread is worthless
It's entertaining (humor bypass aside), realistic and Off Topic.

Worthless?......That's your opinion..........and opinions are like ar$eholes.....everbody has one.
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      08-05-2008, 04:32 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilR View Post
It's entertaining (humor bypass aside), realistic and Off Topic.

Worthless?......That's your opinion..........and opinions are like ar$eholes.....everbody has one.
Oh Phil - priceless mate on all counts. Was the spelling of humor deliberate then?

Maybe it's just us that have the ability to laugh at ourselves.

They need to do what we do in a crisis - put kettle on an 'ave a cup of tea.
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      08-05-2008, 04:45 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beemerbird View Post
Oh Phil - priceless mate on all counts. Was the spelling of humor deliberate then?

Maybe it's just us that have the ability to laugh at ourselves.

They need to do what we do in a crisis - put kettle on an 'ave a cup of tea.
Darn spell checker - set to US. Don't you hate it when the E90 spell checker doesn't work properly.

Stick in a few references to G Bush and I guess our friends from accross the pond would view the whole thread in a different light.

Anyway Easydoesit - you're up sharp and early today. Wasn't another tremor was there?
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      08-05-2008, 04:53 AM   #17
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Maybe this will meet with their approval...

Last edited by willhollin; 12-09-2008 at 05:55 PM.
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      08-05-2008, 02:26 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beemerbird View Post
Was the spelling of humor deliberate then?
Looks OK to me!
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