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      04-04-2006, 05:35 PM   #1
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not being shallow but...how important is physical attraction 2u

I just thought i would get everyones opinion on this.I ve been with my current girlfriend for a little over a year and she is awesome,dont get me wrong.She is cool to my daughter and totally laidback as you could imagine.Its just that there isnt that that raw physical attraction to her like I have had before,My ex was really drop dead gorgeous but an absolute psychopath as well.Do you think that a relationship can still last without that raw attraction .I think its just the fact that shes about 40 lbs overweight and Im attracted to smaller frames usually.I dunno what do you guys think I know this sounds like im being shallow but i also have to be honest with myself for the longrun.
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      04-04-2006, 05:37 PM   #2
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If I were a guy it'd be high on my list but since I'm not it is not even a consideration. As long as he isn't deformed or 400lbs.
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      04-04-2006, 05:37 PM   #3
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Dude, what the heck is this post doing here? Should be moved to a non-e90 section.
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      04-04-2006, 05:38 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nikki
If I were a guy it'd be high on my list but since I'm not it is not even a consideration. As long as he isn't deformed or 400lbs.
You wouldn't know, because you're not a guy. And you lie.
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      04-04-2006, 05:39 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shimshimhada
You wouldn't know, because you're not a guy. And you lie.
I've posted pictures of my boyfriend here, and he is 6'4" 265lbs. I love him for him.
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      04-04-2006, 05:40 PM   #6
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Looks are somewhat important, but to me it's personalilty that means much more. I love my wife, she is beautiful, but she wouldn't be who she is without her personality.

BTW, this is Off-Topic!

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      04-04-2006, 05:41 PM   #7
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cmon nikki,you know you have to have a spacific type of look or personality, or size for your ideal dude
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      04-04-2006, 05:54 PM   #8
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for me personally, looks are the most important thing. Not that they need to be supermodels, but just gorgeous in my eyes. And of course its not enough to be hot; personality and sweetness has to be there too.

You shouldn't feel shallow or guilty because of it. Women have their list of crap that they care about (see my sig), why can't dudes?

If shes not your type, dump her. Never settle... unless you are over 70, then settle. You will probably be wearing diapers by then anyway.

By the way...
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      04-04-2006, 06:08 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shimshimhada
You wouldn't know, because you're not a guy. And you lie.
I agree
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      04-04-2006, 06:10 PM   #10
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Maybe not, but I find it hard not to try to guess a poster's age based on their response! I'll say it, I'm old...er.

I think most people's thoughts on this change as the years tack on...

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      04-04-2006, 06:20 PM   #11
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beauty is in the eyes of the beerholder. Seriously though it only matters what you think of her. You guys have been together for over a year and you've just now realized that she's overweight??? Personally there's gotta be some sort of physical attraction. LIke others here, she doesnt have to be a model, just at least cute. Sometimes you think a person is a little cute and once you get to know them you realize that they're beautiful. It is somewhat important but not the only reason to date someone...
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      04-04-2006, 06:26 PM   #12
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Yeah..beauty is in the eyes of the beholder...however sometimes looks does matter...not to sound shallow, but that is usually 9 times outa 10 what brings you to the other person. You tend to go up to the person you think is attractive...again, you may think shes cute and your friend may not... ....I've had my share of 10's....but it looks like my luck of finding 10's is gone..haha..plus with 10's you run the risk of getting cheated on..like i did...little hint...stick with 7's =)
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      04-04-2006, 06:27 PM   #13
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I agree 100% with you there Danny.

Quote:
Originally Posted by HRC
Maybe not, but I find it hard not to try to guess a poster's age based on their response! I'll say it, I'm old...er.

I think most people's thoughts on this change as the years tack on...

Danny
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      04-04-2006, 06:33 PM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by canucklion
I agree 100% with you there Danny.
yeah i kinda agree....as you get older i think you start settling for less and less..haha...our vision may be getting foggier and foggier as time goes on....that and we realize personality is key!! ahhh! if only she hadn't cheated..she had an awesome personality, we had everything in common, and personally i thought she was a 10...till i catch her kissing some guy on a internet site! now thats the worst way to catch someone!
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      04-04-2006, 06:35 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HRC

I think most people's thoughts on this change as the years tack on...

How true...

I used to be very picky. I was able to hold out for the attractive ones, and have dated a few of them. I then realized how shallow most of the GIRLS were, and moved on...

Now that I am... ummm... older, my tastes in females has changed some. I certainly need to have a strong charactered and active personality for it to work out. Im quite sarcastic, and she needs to be able to roll with those punches. Im very active and she needs to be too.

I now realize what has to be present for it to work out. I certainly will admit that aesthetics does play a role, but its less of a role as you get older. Man Im old...
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      04-04-2006, 06:46 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Explorer3253
yeah i kinda agree....as you get older i think you start settling for less and less..haha...our vision may be getting foggier and foggier as time goes on....that and we realize personality is key!! ahhh! if only she hadn't cheated..she had an awesome personality, we had everything in common, and personally i thought she was a 10...till i catch her kissing some guy on a internet site! now thats the worst way to catch someone!
I'm not sure I would call it "settling". My wife is beautiful! For me, I realized that for the most part, those "10's" were only "10's" in the looks department. Seldom were they interesting, mature or honest. Most time's girls/women who are "10's" realize this early on and play it for what it worth. Not someone I want to be with! It's rare to find that someone who is "DROP DEAD" in the looks department and have a kind and true heart. A normal looking person can be SEXY if the personality is there!


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      04-04-2006, 06:50 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HRC
I'm not sure I would call it "settling". My wife is beautiful! For me, I realized that for the most part, those "10's" were only "10's" in the looks department. Seldom were they interesting, mature or honest. Most time's girls/women who are "10's" realize this early on and play it for what it worth. Not someone I want to be with! It's rare to find that someone who is "DROP DEAD" in the looks department and have a kind and true heart. A normal looking person can be SEXY if the personality is there!


Danny
sorry...didn't mean to use the word settling...you're right with what you said......personality plays a huge part though..example: friend brought some girl he just met...at our groups first glance..we felt she wasn't that attractive..after spending some time with her..she was just a genuinly awesome person, and by the end of the night...i thought she was actually quite attractive..
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      04-04-2006, 07:04 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Explorer3253
sorry...didn't mean to use the word settling...you're right with what you said......personality plays a huge part though..example: friend brought some girl he just met...at our groups first glance..we felt she wasn't that attractive..after spending some time with her..she was just a genuinly awesome person, and by the end of the night...i thought she was actually quite attractive..
Totally!!

And on the other hand, if she was a "10" but was a biatch...not so hot! (We are talking relationships here right, not animal like sex! )

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      04-04-2006, 07:19 PM   #19
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lol..right..not so hot...for relationship....but hey! for a one nighter?
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      04-04-2006, 07:28 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Explorer3253
lol..right..not so hot...for relationship....but hey! for a one nighter?
BANG BANG!!! Sorry, that was crude...

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      04-04-2006, 08:15 PM   #21
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My observation of beauty:

1) Depends on the eyes of the beholder
2) Depends on how much make-up and plastic surgery the lady utilized
3) Depends on how sober the guy is
4) Depends on how accurate the lighting is
5) Depends on the personality of the lady
6) Depends on the lifestyle of the lady (smokes? Christian zealot? scorpion fetish? been with triple digits number of guys?)

Of course, it's always possible to gauge beauty purely from aesthetics without incorporating intangible factors such as personality...but I wouldn't be surprised if the majority of guys find themselves more attractive to a pretty lady who's intelligent and an active volunteer at the Children's Hospital compared to a rich, pretentious bitch who smokes and is drop-dead gorgeous.

Damn, my sleeping dog just pulled a silent fart next to me on the couch. That bastard! :mad:
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      04-04-2006, 08:41 PM   #22
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the physical attraction for me helps in the beginning for me to approach a girl. if she is gorgeous but has an ugly personality she has no chance. im more of an eye guy though.
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