For coming to a stop, I do a similar technique as described by BK above with these exception. I usually drop the gear to 3rd and leave it in 3rd, kinda watch the RPM needle and pay very close attention to the RPM just when it is below 1K (so far up to this point I have not touched the brake-unless someone decided to switch lane right in front of me), then when it is time to really stop because the light is still red, I just press the clutch and brake at the same time and control the stopping motion with the brake. Probably why I have over 50K and my brakes looks like brand new
btw, my car does not shake when I am in 3rd gear and the rpm needle is just below the 1K marker as long as I control the gas and keep the RPM needle steadily right below the 1K mark.