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I have this exact same issue with my 2008 330d.
After taking the car into my local dealer for this problem on several occasions where they've carried out a oil flush and change, updated software and reset adaptions there was a significant improvement.
However this lasted for about 2months before the symptoms were back as before!
I too do a lot of town stop start driving and came to the conclusion that the gearbox is adapting to this type of driving and causing these symptoms!
I have now found if I do the throttle reset as you described (I know a lot of people say this does nothing but it most certainly makes a difference to my car) then drive the car fairly hard for a few journeys the problem then goes again until it re adapts to town driving.
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