[Mahhvinn]

1. I want my wheels to stick out pretty far, would I use spacers, if so which sizes? (Note: I want a staggered look, so I want me rear wheels to stick out more than the front, I'm not looking for a slanted camber, just a wide look)
Buy a 40mm spacer if you want your wheels to stick out pretty far. If you want a properly stanced car, you'll need to get proper width and offsets. Also, you will need to run some camber to help get extra clearance due to the aggressiveness of the wheels.

2. I was thinking KW v1s, because I want to adjust the damper and height.. Is this my best option, I really don't want springs
IIRC, the KW V1's are only height adjustable? I would suggest KW V2's if your budget allows OR you could go with a set of BC Racing Coilovers which have the lowest drop and are both dampening and height adjustable.

3. I'm getting 19x8.5's in the front and 19x9.5 in the rear, should I keep anything in mind with this set up? Or does it really not make a difference
You NEED to calculate OFFSETS as well. Those widths are not aggressive and will not look right if you're trying to get proper stance with POKE. You're going to have a skinny wheel that just protrudes out and you'll look mexi-flush. I would suggest AT THE LEAST 9.5 in the front and 10.5 in the rear.


EDIT:
I just realized you drive an Xi E92. You will have a bit of a hard time running staggered and flush on your E92.